Sometimes I get so frustrated with iTunes and my iPod. It seems like all I ever hear are the same songs, or at least the same artists, over and over again. Ugh, iPod, why do you not understand that I would like some variety?!
Oh, right, maybe it’s because you’re an electronic device that doesn’t really “think”. Or “understand”. Oh well. Whatever.
I guess there’s nothing wrong with routine. I mean, my entire life is based on routine. I wake up in the morning, take my shower, get dressed, make my coffee and my oatmeal (delicious. It’s really, really delicious. Except this afternoon there were no good bananas at the grocery store so tomorrow’s oatmeal will be banana-less and that makes me upset), etc. I work, workout, do pretty much the same thing over and over again, every day. And I like it that way.
I like it so much, in fact, that when I don’t get to stick to this routine, things go a little bit haywire. I mean, it’s never that big a deal, I just feel like it’s the end of the world. Today, for instance, I feel completely out of whack because I didn’t do the run I had planned, don’t have bananas for my oatmeal tomorrow, spent four hours on a bus earlier, and haven’t taken a shower yet. It’s like a disaster.
Mostly I’m mad at myself (or disappointed, maybe, is a better word) for not running today after I had been looking forward to it all day. I went away for the weekend and upon getting back to New York, I just felt drained, and my stomach was (unsurprisingly) in pain for inexplicable reasons. So I didn’t run. It has thrown off my whole day.
I wish I were the sort of person who didn’t need a routine, who enjoyed new experiences (really they just make me anxious), and who could embrace change. But I’m not. I guess as I get older, I just have to accept that.
Anyone else out there feel as attached to their routine as I am? To the point where it interferes with your mood when things don’t go the right way? Or am I just crazy?