Here’s a confession: I feel like I am having a much harder time training for marathon #2 than I was training for marathon #1. I sort of expected the situation to be the reverse. It makes more sense to me that the first marathon, for which I trained alone, would be harder than the second, for which I am training with a team.
I find myself frustrated on a number of levels: for one thing, I feel like the team is not the social outlet I was hoping it would be. I kind of feel like I missed some bonding activity that everyone else participated in, and as a result I feel a little socially intimidated whenever I participate in group runs, or any sort of team-related event such as a race, for instance. For another thing, I have been having a really hard time feeling good about the running I am doing. Lately I have been really over-tired, and feeling really run-down. I have fifteen miles to run today and absolutely no enthusiasm for it. This isn’t helped by the fact that I have come to loathe my camelbak. Putting it on feels like attaching a tumor to my body, and running with it is just plain uncomfortable. I feel like an idiot wearing it, and as minor and silly as that may sound, I don’t really want to go out running looking like an idiot.
I don’t know what’s going on, I have just been feeling so off and drained lately. Today, to be honest, I just don’t feel like going out with a tumor on my lower back, an ipod cord bouncing around and headphones constantly falling out of my ears, and an armband that makes me work twice as hard to even get any information into or out of said ipod.
Does anyone else ever get to feeling this way about something they love? If so, what do you do about it?